Road Back to Reality

       For the last few weeks (since I moved back to school) I have been in kind of a funk, but deeper.  I have just been feeling lost.  I wasn't happy and I felt like there was no purpose in my coming back to UMD.  Luckily, I have Jesus and an awesome discipler (Mary) to bring me back to reality.

picture via Illuminations

       Today I was on my way to discipleship (a weekly meeting with Mary) and I just knew that she would pick up on my mood, and I did NOT want to talk about it.  Of course, she did have me talk about it and knew that what I needed was Jesus (duh).  So we went through an Ignatius prayer in which you imagine yourself in a bible passage, you place yourself there in your mind (it’s really cool).  We read Luke 24:13-35, the story of the men on the road to Emmaus. 

       After the death and resurrection of Jesus, two men were walking on the road to Emmaus.  Jesus appeared and joined them on their journey.  He walked with the men, allowed them to pour themselves out to Him, share their grief and confusion over the death of Jesus of Nazareth, and He explained the scriptures to them so that they could understand what had happened.  When the men reached their destination they asked Jesus to stay with them and He did.  It was at the breaking of the bread that the men recognized Jesus and as soon as they did He vanished from their sight.

       What stuck out to me today, and helped to lift me from my funk was how seemingly obvious it is to us that the man was Jesus, but the people He walked with didn't know it.  I know that this kinda sounds like it would depress me more, I mean these guys didn't know that their Savior was with them, they are oblivious to the glory going on right within their own lives.  However, that is exactly the part that gives me hope.  Even though I have been in this funk and feeling lost and aimless Jesus is walking right next to me.  He is there every step of the way allowing me to pour myself out to Him, express my worries, and He is teaching me.  He is doing all of this without me even noticing that it is Him.  Then, I come before the Eucharist.

       It is in the Eucharist that I am reminded of God’s true love for me, His unending presence in my life.  When I receive Communion or sit before the LORD in adoration I know that Jesus is there with me, in the breaking of the bread.

      This story reminded me of a few things I always need to remember, but often slip my mind.

1)Jesus is always with me

2)Jesus will stay with me if I ask

 3)Jesus will listen to me and teach me

4)Jesus is truly present in the Eucharist

5)I am often oblivious to the glory taking place in my own life . 

       So, yes, my funk is lifting because I know that whether I see it or not glorious things are happening on my journey and eventually I will be able to recognize them.  That gives me hope.

    

       Have you ever been in a deep funk?  Have you felt like what you were doing with your life was pointless?  Have you ever used Ignatius prayer before? What do you think of this story?  Comments? Questions?  Suggestions?  Drop me a line in the comments below!